Punctuate and Turn the Page

“Punctuate and turn the page.” 

A good friend said this to me as we were talking about closing chapters of our lives that were less than ideal, difficult, or just plain messy. At the time, I was in the middle of my season of healing after religious abuse and trauma. I could not shake out of it. As a lover of Jesus since childhood, I understood foundational truths in my head that I was loved and valued, but the repeated experiences of spiritual abuse chipped away at my heart. I could not see past those that manipulated and emotionally abused me “in the name of the Lord.” It was too much.

So I wrestled with my faith and cried out to God for healing. The journey to healing from spiritual abuse was a steep hike where the trail was rarely marked. It was a difficult and slow climb riddled with briars that snagged my heart and ruts that tripped my soul. As I looked around, there were few who continued the journey. With blistered heels and broken shoes, most quit the faith and said goodbye to the church. There was a long season for me that I was lost and wandering and nearly joined them. 

But I did not.

The Lord met me on my trail of despondency and gently guided me back to Himself. As I made it through the clearing and fell back in love with Him, I looked around and saw others who were stuck in the brush and brambles of church hurt. Several asked me how I got out, how I healed. “It’s not easy,” I would say. I’d tell them my story and point them to resources that would provide balm to their wounds. It seemed like as soon as another got free of abuse, another one was caught, then another. They kept on coming, like ants pouring out of their home when an intruder stormed in. And I wondered how I could help?

So I wrote a book. 

This is me on a recent hike in Oregon. I was off the trail, standing on a log, looking for a stream of water that I could hear, but couldn’t see through the thick foliage.

And I just finished the first draft. 

And I can’t wait to share it with the world.

But I need your help. I need Beta Readers who are willing to read the raw copy and give me feedback on what still needs editing. The pounding of my heart is to help others heal. I can’t fix the church. I can’t force abusers to stop beating others with scripture for their own benefit. But I can share my story to help others heal from religious abuse. 

I’ll be ready for Beta Readers at the beginning of October. If you enjoy Young Adult Fiction and are willing to give honest feedback, I would truly appreciate your insight. I only have a few slots left to fill. Please, comment below and let me know you’re interested. I’ll get back to you with details. 

I’ve punctuated and turned the page. And now I want you to read it. 

Your story matters. Your voice matters. 

This is me at the foot of Mt. Hood after a 6-mile hike.

The Hindsight of 2020

No one could have predicted the dumpster fire that is 2020. It's ironic thinking back to the discussion going into the new year that it would be a year of perspective, of clearer vision, and a way of seeing life differently. Certainly, this year has been a challenge for all, and I think in many ways we all have a new perspective on life; gratitude for family gatherings, humble thanks for meeting friends for coffee, and joy in being able to hug another human being. They say hindsight is 2020 and that couldn’t be more accurate as we stand on the precipice of another new year. 

As I’m sitting down to write my goals for 2021 I realized how silent I’ve been on this blog. Last December when I planned out my writing goals, I had decided to shift my time from blog posts and social media to more purposeful manuscript writing. After a few years of multiple rejections and polite “nos” from publishing houses and agents, I licked my wounds and lovingly put my steampunk manuscripts aside. And then pulled out a fresh sheet of paper and began diving into a new work that has helped me remember why I love writing. 

As a kid, I read lots of historical fiction. I took advanced history classes in high school and have an affinity for genealogy. There’s something to be learned from the stories of those who have lived lifetimes before us. In returning to my roots of reading, I’ve begun a new adventure in writing. The working title for my manuscript is “The Two Harriets” and is centered around the lives of Harriet Tubman and Harriet Beecher Stowe. These two women never met, but through their actions and words, they changed the face of a nation. To my surprise, very little in historical fiction has been written about either woman. I have researched, and read, and breathed in the amazing lives of these women and can’t wait to share their story with you. 

I appreciate your grace as I navigate the writer’s life. Working full time and having the mental space to write during a pandemic year has been interesting, to say the least. But as we’ve learned this year, we’re stronger than we think and braver than we know. I’m grateful for you, dear reader, and sending the best hopes and wishes into the new year for you and your loved ones.