“Punctuate and turn the page.”
A good friend said this to me as we were talking about closing chapters of our lives that were less than ideal, difficult, or just plain messy. At the time, I was in the middle of my season of healing after religious abuse and trauma. I could not shake out of it. As a lover of Jesus since childhood, I understood foundational truths in my head that I was loved and valued, but the repeated experiences of spiritual abuse chipped away at my heart. I could not see past those that manipulated and emotionally abused me “in the name of the Lord.” It was too much.
So I wrestled with my faith and cried out to God for healing. The journey to healing from spiritual abuse was a steep hike where the trail was rarely marked. It was a difficult and slow climb riddled with briars that snagged my heart and ruts that tripped my soul. As I looked around, there were few who continued the journey. With blistered heels and broken shoes, most quit the faith and said goodbye to the church. There was a long season for me that I was lost and wandering and nearly joined them.
But I did not.
The Lord met me on my trail of despondency and gently guided me back to Himself. As I made it through the clearing and fell back in love with Him, I looked around and saw others who were stuck in the brush and brambles of church hurt. Several asked me how I got out, how I healed. “It’s not easy,” I would say. I’d tell them my story and point them to resources that would provide balm to their wounds. It seemed like as soon as another got free of abuse, another one was caught, then another. They kept on coming, like ants pouring out of their home when an intruder stormed in. And I wondered how I could help?
So I wrote a book.
This is me on a recent hike in Oregon. I was off the trail, standing on a log, looking for a stream of water that I could hear, but couldn’t see through the thick foliage.
And I just finished the first draft.
And I can’t wait to share it with the world.
But I need your help. I need Beta Readers who are willing to read the raw copy and give me feedback on what still needs editing. The pounding of my heart is to help others heal. I can’t fix the church. I can’t force abusers to stop beating others with scripture for their own benefit. But I can share my story to help others heal from religious abuse.
I’ll be ready for Beta Readers at the beginning of October. If you enjoy Young Adult Fiction and are willing to give honest feedback, I would truly appreciate your insight. I only have a few slots left to fill. Please, comment below and let me know you’re interested. I’ll get back to you with details.
I’ve punctuated and turned the page. And now I want you to read it.
Your story matters. Your voice matters.
This is me at the foot of Mt. Hood after a 6-mile hike.